I grab myself a fruit off the branch above. This was my safe place–I take my familiar seat underneath this grandiose tangerine tree. The local park carries an energy so peaceful; pure innocent life graces the paths around. The tangerine, as I take a bite, carries extra richness today. I close my eyes and fall into a meditative state.
To embrace this present moment is to be here, with everything as it is, just as it is. To be in harmony is to be in full acceptance with all that is; there is no need to give meaning to it all, but to accept it all for what it is. To heal is to surrender in love. To breathe is to remind you of this gift of life. To live with an open heart is to open your heart to the chance of love. Breathe in… Breathe out…
I awaken–I see a butterfly fluttering around me. It brings me comfort. It lands on my nose, so delicate, so kind. With a shoo of my hand, it gracefully flies away into the distance. Its presence, however, lingers, complimenting the peace that I woke up feeling. In truth, its presence amplified my peace a bit more.
It’s been some time since my last visit to this tangerine tree. The leaves of the tree paint bare. The fruit on its branches are scarce. The park carries an uneasy stillness today. The grass isn't as green today. But I’ve missed this place. Something brought me back to this place.
Underneath this familiar tangerine tree, I fall into a familiar meditative state.
Breathe in…
To feel this pain is the beginning. To feel this pain as your own is you accepting. To see it and all its deeper meaning is the lesson. To understand your wrongs is rightful–but to hold onto them is disastrous. To know that you are fearful is normal, but to let go of fear is faith. To take the risk brings chance. To understand you’re healing is to know the world around you is too. To carry love regardless is the answer through it all.
Breathe out…
I awake once more. Startled a bit by the slight movement above.
“Oh. hello butterfly”. Last time I glanced at this branch, I was reaching for a tangerine; here on this branch this time was no fruit, but instead a butterfly, perched gently upon it. It feels my presence, I can tell, yet it feels no need to fly away. I embrace its presence as it feels familiar to me. “I’ve seen you before. Hello again”. A subtle breeze sways the branch; this butterfly is forced from its place. I was waiting to witness its graceful flight into the open sky around. But oddly, I was presented instead with a downward fall and struggle–it was then when I realized, “I had awoken last time to your graceful flutter around me. Are you okay this time?” What was more painful: witnessing its fall in those moments or having not allowed for its graceful dance around me last time? I open my hand, and let it fall upon it–I look down to expect its familiar pureness. Instead, I see its broken wing. Broken–I feel its pain, yet I still see all its beauty, beauty that never fleeted. In that moment, I realize the reason for my visit that day. This butterfly with a broken wing–it had found me sitting underneath a tangerine tree one day before, arriving to me in its purest form, trusting, accepting, fluttering in flight so beautifully around me. Today, it came to me differently, yet knowing where to find me. It knew I would be here waiting for its return. Today, differently–it yearned for my warm embrace, and I was right here ready to embrace it. I embraced it, now, with a desire to nurture its delicate pureness.
With the butterfly in hand, I peer down to see the bitten tangerine from my last visit–unfinished, bygone, disappearing into the dirt upon which it laid.
I look back at that butterfly from time to time. I always believed I was returning to that tangerine tree for more of its fruit. Maybe I was–seeking for something that wasn’t worth my seeking. Now deep down, I feel I was returning for something different, something unexpected, for what instead one day chose to present itself upon that branch where that fruit should have been. That tangerine carried extra richness that day. I left that day, however, with peace from a butterfly I had never felt before.